Answer…I don’t know.
That’s the question – and the answer – that seems to be fairly common for us these days. Everyone in our world knows that we should be getting ready to leave – and wondering why we’re still here. We have the “extreme weather” to thank for our sudden stop in action. Remember that “extreme” cold weather we had about three weeks ago? We had snow in May, Texas had a severe freeze. The freeze put a halt on the pre-harvest work. Jim made the phone call to the fellow harvester we help. When Delaine saw that it was Jim calling, he didn’t even say hello – he answered the phone with, “I don’t know”. The “I don’t know” was later changed to, “we’re not needed”. The insurance adjuster visited the wheat fields only to find the wheat crop MIGHT yield 4 bushels to the acre. Not enough to justify the help of a custom harvester. It had to be a disappointment to our farmer but an even greater disappointment for us. No wheat…no income.
Let me introduce you to the newest member of the Z Crew:
Jamie is doing VERY well and I’m so proud of her! She worked long and hard for that little guy. My only concern is…will we know how to take care of a boy? He missed sharing his birthday with Grandpa by 6 hours. Darn!
I never thought sitting in the maternity waiting room would be so emotional. Maybe it’s the time of day (1:55 am) or maybe it’s just the emotions of the moment. Whatever it is, I never expected it! The tears just won’t quit.
I’m sitting here by myself concerned for my daughter’s well being! It’s the mother’s heart yearning to be with her child when she’s hurting. Something that was placed in my heart the moment I laid eyes on her 27 years ago.
I know Jamie and Curt were right in making the decision to do this as a couple but just so hard, as a mom, to sit here and know that always before when she was hurt and in pain, I was there for her.
So, I sit and I wait knowing that the next time I see my oldest daughter she, too, will be a mom. Maybe one day she will be sitting where I am and understand the uneasy feeling deep in my soul. The only way to ease that motherly desire to be there holding her hand and telling her its going to be ok is knowing that Curt is there doing that very thing. Still doesn’t ease that anxiousness that I’ve felt most of today.
I tried to stay away. And I did until about 3:30 this afternoon. The anxious feeling in my heart just wouldn’t give up till I was sitting in the room with her. Or walking the halls with her. Or helping through the contractions. Doing ANYTHING to help with her hurt.
I am truly anxious to meet my first grandchild! But right now, what I’m most anxious for is to get in that room and see for myself that Jamie is ok, give her a hug and tell her how proud I am of her!
After that…I will introduce myself to the newest member of our family!
Jamie’s due date was Monday, April 1. Tomorrow will be the week beyond the day she was expecting to give birth.
I saw her today. Poor girl…she is MISERABLE! We had some really yummy peach/apricot wine (thanks Dale!) to sample this evening. She decided she’d have a few sips. She was paying for it big time with severe heart burn the rest of the evening. I remember being at the point she is now – just ready for my body to be back to “normal”.
While she was sitting here, she pointed to her belly and exclaimed, “watch this!” I made it over to her just in time to see her lop-sided belly start to move. One jab over here – another over there. While the whole family was gathered around her very swollen belly, we all began trying to coach that baby to make its appearance SOON! “Please, baby, come tomorrow”. “Stop being a bad baby and make your appearance”. “Come out NOW”!
She asked me to go to her dr. appointment tomorrow. No turning that request down! Maybe it will be her last. Jim’s birthday is Tuesday. I wonder if this baby is just waiting for Tuesday to roll around so it can celebrate his/her special day with Grandpa?
On another note, I hung clothes on the line today AND began cleaning garden debris from the flower gardens. I just can’t believe how therapeutic it is to dig in the dirt! My back is yelling a little tonight but I’m hoping I can get back out there again soon! It’s been a LONG winter and it sounds like the “S” word is making its way back in the forecast later this week.
It will soon start feeling like harvest is around the corner. The trailer house is coming out of storage on Wednesday. It has an appointment to get a few issues taken care of before the big trip south. I’m anxious for harvest to roll around but I’m NOT anxious to leave a six-week old baby and come home to a five month old. I will miss so much – it makes me want to cry!
I’ve never been to a dairy before. I mean…a REAL dairy. I’ve been to farms in the past that have included milking cows on their list of chores. Farms used to be more diversified than they are now. Most farms used to include cattle, pigs, chickens, and other animals as well as crops (wheat, corn, soybeans, etc.). Having animals on the farm requires so much more of the farmer’s attention than just the farming. Milking cows requires even more attention than cattle raised for beef which can be found on ranches. Dairy cattle need milked every day. They don’t care about the weather or the holidays or vacations. What they care about is being milked and that doesn’t happen unless they have a calf or human hands to do the job.
Any guesses? Hint…it’s not snow.
I saw a sign of spring in our “neck of the woods” on Friday. The snow geese have made their way through on their journey back to the northern country. It’s always a welcome sight…as is the return of the Robins. Know what I miss the most during winter? The song of the birds!!! The past couple of weeks, though, the songs have returned. I have to wait till the end of April for my favorite-the “Jenny” wren.
I went to her friends house to take pictures…still not feeling 100%. But, Taylor convinced me she didn’t care about how bad I may look so I went. I’m so glad I did. Her very last class “fling” forever. I started feeling the tears well up in my eyes as I drove away from the school. How could it be that she and all these friends that I have grown to love be nearly grown up and leaving? I’ve been pretty close to several of her classmates since they were in kindergarten. The years go WAY TOO FAST! I’m sure those tears won’t be the only ones I shed this spring!
I started this post nearly a week ago. I hadn’t finished it because I wanted to add a few pictures. Unfortunately, my body decided to get really sick after I wrote this. I think I may make it…even though I think it would have been better to have someone just shoot me. I’m going to push the “publish” button without pictures. We’ll just hope I feel better soon and I can add pictures later. I have been reminded of something – BIG TIME – this week…when you have your health-you have the world!
A lot has happened since the last time I posted. Gosh…has it been nearly a month? I will try to make up for the lost time and the stories but it will have to wait just a little while longer. Who would have guessed life could get so crazy!